I put on my Facebook profile a question yesterday … what does love mean to you? It made me think of love in terms of our closest relationship, that with our beloved. These were the responses and thank you so much to everyone who did respond xx
Q. What does LOVE mean to you?
A. A feeling of belonging; contentment; it leaves you speachless and the feeling of completness; butterflies in my tummy; everything; finding the piece to my puzzle – and I did; being for others; feelings emotions and acceptance; love is everything.
In terms of a romantic partnership, it is so nice to have a human friend who holds you as their object of attention and adores you right into your connection. However as Abraham-Hicks would share, there is an experience greater than this and it is independence. How about we say to our lovers, “I love you, but I don’t live for you. Because Source Energy flows through me. You are a catalyst to my well-being, but you are not essential to my well-being. Because I’ve got that figured out on my own. I have reached for thoughts that give me relief and I have relieved myself all the way into my full connection of who I really am. And now we can just dance and play together.”
Can you feel how you take them off the hook? In other words, do you know how many lovers would flock to you if they knew that you would allow them to be as they are and you would not hold them responsible for your happiness. That’s what everyone wants.
There is so much bondage in believing that our happiness depends on another. It’s an impossible task to be what others want us to be!
The greatest gift you can give anyone is to be happy. The greatest gift you can give to any partner, past, present or future is to be so connected with who you truly are that they are irrelevant to your connection. And when they are irrelevant to your connection, then you are going to have a really good time together.
This my friends is the way to true happiness within a relationship – it’s not what most of us have been bought up to believe. I know seeing my parents interact that it certainly was not the case. I grew up with some very screwy ideas on how relationships should be – I saw a tug of war and it’s all very hard and no one can be happy in relationships because it’s a power struggle and a hole host of warped ideas. I now know that unless we are whole and complete within ourselves, unless we look inside ourselves for our own sense of self and happiness that we are very capable of giving ourselves, we will be forever in battle with the ones closest to us.
I would love some comments on this one!!!
December 2nd, 2009 at 9:38 pm
Hi Justine!
I completly agree with you. I think if you don’t love youself you can’t completely love anyone else. You will be jealous of others and you think that youre not worth to be loved.
xx
December 2nd, 2009 at 9:56 pm
Hey Lisa, yes that’s so true isn’t it. I just had a journey process with Julie and we were talking about loving ourselves unconditionally. We were not taught this as children, but we can certainly teach our children : ) x
December 3rd, 2009 at 5:58 pm
Hi Jus,
Love your blog post. I know my life has changed significantly since I learnt to accept and love who I am unconditionally, not take what others say personally and to accept others as who they are. This is particularly true with a partner – its important to look at the ‘whole’ person, accept their faults (if that’s what you consider them to be) and remember why you fell in love with them in the first place. Never try to change someone – it will always backfire! :O) x
December 6th, 2009 at 2:29 pm
Hey Amanda, thanks for the comment. This self love thing I thought I knew what that meant but it wasn’t until I really looked at myself and the relationships of my past that I realised how much I wasn’t truly being there for me and I was focussing on making sure I was ok in their eyes and forgetting about me. When you get on the journey of inner work and really start to connect with YOU, man, the love you feel for everybody is profound because it is coming from a true place within yourself. Never look without for the love you seek, it is within, always has been and always will be. Much love to you. Jus xx
December 19th, 2009 at 9:51 pm
Merry Christmas Justine,
My name is Steve Garrison, Author of the new book, “The Five Secrets from Oz.” My book is a novel about life transformation and finding your inner light. I deal with issues like: obesity, depression, gang violence, people who have given up on their passion in life and finally I deal with love and relationships.
I was very intrigued by your post on your FACEBOOK about “what love means to you.” I am a 38-yr-old, single-father of three who has been searching for the answer for almost four years. I know what I want and I have put my intentions to the universe, but it seems the woman I am attracting to me are getting me further and further away from what I am looking for in a woman.
I think Tom Cruise said it best in the movie, Jerry Maguire, when he told Rene Zellwegger, “You complete me.” I think love means to me, someone who completes me.
Love means, a woman who I can be proud to introduce to my family and friends. A woman who, after she gets up to use the rest room, my friends say, ‘You da MAN!” Love means a woman who appreciates my wit, humor, incredible energy, charm and drive. A woman who I connect with physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually. Love means a woman who I would be proud to introduce to my children and who would love them as their family, yet understanding that they do have a real mother.
Love means being in an elevator and just looking at your partner and kissing. Or at a carnival with the kids as she reaches for your hand and kisses you for no reason. Love means having sex…other than a bed every now and then. Love means, having a commitment to work on the relationship and always do things that are going to keep the passion alive for years.
Love is the most powerful drug on the planet. It has healing powers beyond medicine.
Thanks for letting me share Justine. Blessings to you and your family for a very Merry Christmas,
Steve